Mohammad Ashraful who is one of the best batters from Bangladesh recently revealed that he thought of committing suicide many times during the match fixing scandal.
Talking about the scandal that happened seven years ago, the 35 years old revealed that his brother-in-law consoled him.
“I wanted to commit suicide when the news was broken by Kaler Kantho [leading Bengali daily] and it occurred few more times,” he told Cricbuzz.
“I shared these thoughts with my brother-in-law [Mojibul Alam] and he did the right thing by ridiculing me. He told me that even a great player like Azharuddin has gone through such hardships. The public and the fans will be upset, but I would have to soldier through it.” Ashraful recalled his brother-in-law consoling him after the incident.
“I always used to think how can I survive in such a situation, how do I show my face in public, what should I tell my family, what will happen to them, how will I cover up the social stigma which will be inflicted upon me and my family,” he said.
“I know I need to perform extraordinarily if I want to make a return. In 2018 I scored five centuries in Dhaka Premier League – a record which still stands. So, I proved myself and played well but my effort was hardly recognized,” he said.
“After asking for forgiveness there is nothing to do for me. I got the punishment, asked for forgiveness and now if they don’t forgive me then I don’t have anything to do.”
“I realize that they, the selectors, may never really forgive me for what I have done,” Ashraful concluded.
Ashraful, who was a part of many famous wins, got into a match-fixing scandal in Dhaka Premier League (DPL) in 2013, and it brought a premature end to his international career.
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